It amazes me how well God’s timing is. Of course it’s frustrating in the season of waiting but it’s only because you never realize that the waiting period is also the preparation period. Those are the moments where you’re waiting for God to ‘make moves’ in your life, except you don’t see the work He is doing behind the curtain of your life. He is pulling the strings together- there are no coincides when it comes to God, He is always intentional.
I am fortunate to have great friends and spiritual leaders in my life who speak truth into my life when I feel lost or have questions. About six months ago I found myself sitting in a coffee shop with a woman from my church. We had talked for what seemed like twenty minutes which was actually two hours. The venting session led to many questions that arose on my end. I’ve always found the concept of God’s will so challenging to grasp. I had always pictured it as a bulls-eye that I had to hit in the center in order to be in line with His will. If I missed the center then I lost and everything else in life would have a trickle effect. I’m kind of embarrassed now thinking back to it. Assuming that if I made one wrong decision I would throw off God’s divine plan, as if my power was anywhere close to the Fathers’.
“Am I on the right track? How do I know if He wants me to choose A or B? Is he happy with where I am at? Is this my calling?”. These were just the tip of the iceberg. I was so focused on this idea of having my five-year plan approved by Him just before I would have received my diploma back in December. Over and Over the woman kept telling me “Be confident in your present.” What did that even mean? I had just spent two hours asking her for guidance on deciphering God’s plan and she responded with five words.
When I went back to school I had that phrase playing back in my head, but when real life got in the way I soon forgot about these words. The next few months were some of the best months I had while in college. My life was so busy but everything was working out better than I could have ever imagined. I felt as if everything was falling into place right before graduation. Then all of a sudden I found myself moving home feeling empty, tired and hopeless. The great opportunities and exciting things going on in my life all seemed to fall through. Like really God, was this the plan? I was so confused, bitter and insecure. A friend of mine planned a trip to visit me the first week of January, the timing was perfect because it was going to help me get my mind off of everything. Our days were filled with great coffee, southern food and nonstop talking. We had planned this grand hike for the past two years and finally had the chance to go on her last day of the visit. When we finally made it to the top I sat on the edge of the rocks and just looked out at the view- taking in the big feat that I had accomplished. In the moment the once familiar phrase came back into my head, “Be confident in your present.” I was to enjoy the now, to enjoy what He has for me in the present.
There was a total transformation in my mindset. It was as if I finally grasped the concept of God’s will. I understood the importance of His will pertaining to my future but never that His will also stretches into my present.
I think it’s so easy for us to think of God as distant. We forget that He is with us and He will never leave us. His omnipresence is with me in the moments and actions I have in the present. If my heart desires to align with His and my actions are responses that show His glory then I am already aligning myself with His will. I’m not trying to downplay His will for my future but I know that if I am abiding in His will in my present it will be easy for me to do the same for the future. He will always direct you if you seek Him, there will not always be a clear answer when it pertains to certain decisions (Sometimes Plan A and Plan B can both be good). When it comes to making those decisions embrace the freedom you have been given to make decisions. What you choose will not surprise God.
-I’m Not A Writer, I’m Just Trying to Save Money on Buying A Diary-